Just soak that in for a moment, and allow me to elaborate.
When I was shopping for childproofing gear, in a feeble attempt to maintain the illusion of security against a toddler, I figured all those doo-hickies were the same. I mean, yeah they look different, but really how is one cabinet lock different from another? Boy, was I feeble minded. (In my defense, I was also severely sleep deprived, and shopping for this stuff with a husband who thought duct taping everything shut was a good plan.)
Anyway, I bought the first thing I saw that was for cabinets/drawers and figured we were in good shape. It wasn't until Aron started "The Installation Process" that I realized something had gone horribly wrong. Here is a photo of our first childproofing locking device.
This is one of those things you screw the little piece in to the underside of the top of the inside of the drawer/cabinet frame (you're scratching your head already, aren't you?) and the big piece in to the inside top of the drawer or cabinet door, and when you close the drawer/cabinet they connect and lock together. When you want to open it again it only opens about 2 inches and you have to push down on the big piece to disconnect it from the small piece and it will "unlock" for you. It took about 10 minutes for each one to get "installed" because the screws are tiny and Aron kept dropping them, and it's hard to screw anything in to the inside top underside blah blah of a freaking drawer because there's not much room to maneuver. When he had gotten them in all the floor level kitchen cabinets and the drawers in the living room, we thought we were in good shape. Haha! we thought, We have thwarted your attempts to pillage our kingdom, silly toddler!
Right.
Owen figured out in about 14 seconds that the two inches the stuff opens is plenty big enough for him to reach in to with his tiny little arms, and if he can reach in he can grab stuff, and if he can grab stuff he can sometimes pull it out, or at least make a mess. We also ran out of them before we got to every cabinet, and I didn't really want to screw anything in to this cabinet of my Mom's, so we headed to Babies-R-Us for more supplies.
We found these little gems...
They look innocent and helpful, right? Pshaw. The idea is that they clip, each rounded end, around the knobs of a cabinet, and then you pull it together to tighten it depending on how far apart the knobs are. To release it you push on the little part sticking out of the bottom and then pull them apart. The funny shaped part in the inside of the right rounded end is the locking mechanism, and when it's tightened enough to lock, the little icon flips to a green one.
Simple enough.
The problem was that once I got it on a cabinet, which was simple enough, it took both hands, tugging like crazy, blood sweat and tears, and a few curse words to get the damn thing apart again. Apparently this lock is best for a cabinet you don't plan to get in to more than once or twice a century. Sooooo, back to the drawing board (that's a euphemism for "That Goddamn Babies-R-Us That Takes All Our Money").
I thought these looked both uncomplicated and easy to disconnect.
You press the center button to disengage the locking mechanism, pull it apart, place each end around a cabinet knob, slide it closed, and PRESTO! One easy to use baby lock, one safe cabinet, one happy Mommy. Here's the problem, folks. These things, which were the B-R-Us brand, are flimsy and deceptively annoying. If Owen pulled hard enough on the cabinet knobs he could bend the plastic on these enough to get an arm inside and wreak havoc. And if, when you take it off, the pieces separate, there is only ONE correct way to put them back together, because one hole and one long end each have a little extra space cut out, which you can maybe sort of see in the picture. It's not as easy as it sounds to figure out the right way when you have a baby rolling around on the floor with poop on his butt trying to stand up and get in the cabinet that is now luring him with its openness, because you need both hands free to corral him. Needless to say, I grew to hate these in a few short days, and so we decided to give it one last try...then we were just going to sell all the furniture and install those cabinets high on the walls out of his reach.
Here's what we ended up with...here's what saved my sanity.
These miraculous feats of engineering are complex, but pretty easy to use actually. And they are DEFINITELY child proof. Basically, you loop the straps around the knobs, connect the two pieces so they lock together, and tighten the straps. To release you press both the bottom lever and the middle button and pull them apart. To release the straps if you want to remove it completely, you raise two tiny levers, one on each piece, and pull. These things are sturdy, very adjustable, and completely resilient to my child's tactical maneuvers. They rule, they're not expensive, and you don't have to drill any holes in your furniture!
So after weeks of testing, we determined that the Safety 1st weird looking strappy double lock things were the far superior child lock. Go on out and buy one today! :)
No comments:
Post a Comment